My name is Erika, my sobriety date is October 3, 2015. On that day, I boarded a 1- way ticket from Dallas, TX to Orange County, CA at 41 years old, I had once again lost everything. I entered a sober living and treatment program for women (for the millionth time). Didn’t know a single soul, didn’t know what was going to happen or if I would live to see another day...
I was experiencing a drug-induced psychosis where I couldn’t tell what was real-life and what was my mind playing tricks on me, I was petrified, angry, lonely, suicidal and exhausted from life. My mind was so loud and full of death threats but something inside me kept me going. I made a decision to create a good life for myself regardless of what anyone’s opinion was including my own.
I disconnected from every single toxic relationship I had and every negative place or thing that interfered with my recovery. I fully concentrated on nurturing myself back to life. I put in the hard work of working a program of recovery (whether I liked it or not). Took direction and accepted guidance from those who my Higher Power placed in my life. I put down my pride and ego, I stopped blaming the world and pointing the finger and accepted responsibility for my own self.
Today I have an amazing, beautiful, FULL life. I STILL do the hard work I STILL have hard days and question myself but the noise has gotten a lot quieter and bearable. I have a new family and friends and a whole sisterhood of amazing women. My husband @frankball is a God sent whose love saved my life and I couldn’t have done any of it without him.
Today Frank and I also help other addicts who struggle with this disease. We created a Nonprofit Organization “We Are Those People'' which is dedicated to sharing peoples stories of hope and recovery, advocacy for Mental health care reform and educating the public that recovery is possible. We are here to share hope for the addict who still suffers and the families who struggle alongside us.
If you or someone you know is struggling with this disease I want you to know that there is a way out. There are people who care and who want you to succeed and help you make it to the other side. Reach out, ask for help and make the decision to give yourself a chance at life. Only you can make this decision.
The before picture you see here is from a time when I had been up for about 5 or 6 days. Sleep deprived, food deprived, completely hopeless and wishing I was dead. My after picture is a clean and sober,happy Erika.
Thank you Soberoso for allowing me the opportunity to share.
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